Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Not Another Bad Date~

Without further ado, the first story in the Not Another BAD DATE series.  

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After coming out of a very long-term relationship, like 7 years long,  I didn't know where to start in the dating world again.  After a few friend suggestions and not wanting to be asked out in a bar, I joined the online dating world.  It started out as great experience for me.  I was getting back out there and met a few nice guys.  I wasn't ready to settle down yet so I was happy dating around.   I started talking to this guy who appeared nice.  I had this feeling that we weren't going to hit it off well once we met but I gave him the benefit of the doubt and agreed to meet him.


We continued talking (he texted me constantly -- too much! definitely a warning sign!) and at that point we had agreed to meet but never made definite plans.  After a few days of still talking with no scheduled date, he texts me while I'm shopping with my friend.   It was 11:30 and he asks me to meet him for lunch at 1 (which hello?! you should plan your first meeting instead of just randomly asking with no notice).  I told him that I was out with my friend and he said that I could bring her and it would help me in making our first meeting more comfortable.  My friend was all about it, of course! She wanted to go! I agreed and told him that we would meet him for lunch.  We drove to meet him at The Cheesecake Factory and he called me while I was on the way to confirm I was still meeting him (umm .. I had literally just agreed and he needed to confirm??).


We arrive and meet outside.  He looks like his picture, which sometimes you can never be too sure with people from online so that was a good thing!  We walk inside and he tells me that I look nice and that I'm very pretty.  We sit down and order and start talking.  It really did help that my friend was there because the conversation flowed a lot better.  Throughout the conversation, he would constantly tell me how pretty I am.  (Like too much, I heard you the first few times, thank you. He was definitely trying too hard.)   But ironically enough, as often as he told me how pretty I was, he didn't like certain things about my appearance.  He told me three times that although I had nice hair, he didn't understand why I colored it and why I would want to have roots.  He said that I should grow it out and leave it all one color.  (Nice, right? First meeting and he's already telling me what he'd like me to change.)


The food comes and so does the inappropriate conversation.  As soon as we start eating, he says to my friend, "You're a teacher too right?". She says, "Yes, I teach Spanish in a middle school." He says, "Oh, middle school.  Have you ever had a girl get her period and stand up with blood on her chair?"  (Sorry that's not the most pleasant sentence, but seriously that's exactly what he said!)  And we're eating and how is that appropriate?! She says, "NO" and we look to change to a more appropriate topic but obviously he had different intentions.  He then asks me, "Well, have any of your second graders peed in their pants and have to go to the nurse for a new pair of clothes."  I say, "NO" and immediately shift the subject completely after saying I didn't feel that was appropriate conversation.


We finish eating and my friend and I alternate going to the bathroom a bunch of times just to get away from the table.  While I was in the bathroom,  he had asked my friend if she thought I'd go out with him for dinner and a movie that same night and she had told him she thought it would be better to ask me and maybe we could go another night.  When I returned to the table, he told me that he had asked my friend if I'd go out with him later tonight.  He then proceeded to ask my out.  I said that we could go out a different night.  ( I wasn't going to tell him right then and there, who knows what he would have said or done?! HAHA)   He then told me about 5 times how much he was looking forward to seeing me again and what a pretty girl I am.  (Yes, again! I wanted so badly to say something about him disliking my roots but I didn't.)


We wrap up lunch and hope that the waiter will bring our check soon.  (BTW, the waiter was so cute, I wanted to go out with him instead! HAHA)  The waiter comes to our table and he decides to order cheesecake.  He insists we order cheesecake too and since well the date was horrible enough ... we decided that we would definitely indulge and share a piece of cheesecake. We eat our cheesecake and he asks again if I'll go out with him again later that night.  I tell him again we'll go out another night.  The check comes and my friend and I offer to pay for our lunches and he tells us that he wouldn't take our money and that he'd be happy to pay for lunch.  We ask him if he's sure and he insists.   He takes out his wallet and begins to pay.  He fans his money out in the air in front of him to make us aware of how much money he has and how much he is paying for lunch.  (NO JOKE!)  He counts the money twice before he finally put it in the guest check folder.    We get ready to leave and walk outside.  He tries to kiss me goodbye on the cheek but instead I leaned in to give him a hug and thanked him for lunch.  We all said goodbye and my friend and I walked to my car. We got in and immediately started laughing!  We start driving home when he texts me and tells me what a great time he had and how he can't wait to see me again.  I waited to respond and thanked him again for lunch.  He said he would text me the next day and I didn't respond after that.  The following day before he had the chance to text me I texted him to tell him that I thought he was a nice guy but I didn't think it was going to work out and thanked him again for lunch.  He responded that he was disappointed and I left it at that.  


I remained on the online dating website for two more months until my subscription ended.  In that two month period, he e-mailed me 4 times.  He would send me quotes about second chances and asked if I could give him a second chance to which I never responded.


Don't y'all think he was too much?  Would you have went on a second date with him? Or given him a second chance?

If anyone else has a dating story that they would like to share, e-mail me at nbsweetheart729@gmail.com for more details.  I'd love to hear from you :)

27 comments:

Suze said...

oh goodness girl you are a better person than me to last the whole way through that meal!!!!! As far as the pretty comment , they are fine if truly means it but gets critical with your looks yeah i would have been like get on and move it buster. ha. But i would have been long gone after the innappropriate conversations! Some guys just dont think or know how to talk to a girl they truly are into personally from my own experiences . AND I so dont blame you for NOT going on a 2nd date with him! Truly understandable!!!!! I wouldnt have even given him a hug haha. You should write a book and collaborate everyones bad dates of how you know when you need to RUN as fast as you can on a date ha :) Hope your enjoying your break!!!!

JLN said...

Oh man! That could have been a Seinfeld episode!!! Haha....I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall during THAT lunch date!! WHY would he ask about your students embarrassing themselves or ask your friend if she thought you would go out with her when you were just in the bathroom? Wow!! Seriously could be a chapter in a book...too funny! I guess it was good that your friend was there because I'm pretty sure nobody would believe you otherwise!!! haha

 Curly J said...

That's insane! I'm glad your friend went with you to meet up with him though.. you never know how those situations can turn out. I would definitely NOT have gone out with him on a second date though. Sure, a guy can be nervous and say stupid things... but what he said was inappropriate. Good call!! :)

p.s. I'm one of your newest followers!

Molly said...

wow. haha. Way too much. First off, do guys not understand we DON'T like when they text us every two flipping seconds. I, personally, like a guy with confidence that plays hard to get at first. And I just about died laughing at the whole period, pee pants lines. GOODNESS. I would have sprinted out of there. lol.

Nicole said...

Wow, that guy sounds like more of a creeper than the guy in the story you shared yesterday! It's a good think you went with a friend to meet him though! And it's good you didn't go out with him on a second date, you did the right thing!!

Meg said...

Wow, that is a crappy first date like woah. I met my hubby online so I luckily had a good experience but I can imagine there are bad ones. Lol.

Jessica Renee said...

OMG! What a freak! Why would he ask those things and on your first date especially? That would've weirded me out to no end! Definitely a good call to end things when you did, you dodged a major bullet!

Lou said...

OMG, that guy is odd. Who asks those kinda questions. That is insane, crude and very inappropriate. Wow. glad you ran from that one!

melissa said...

Creeper!! I would not have responded either! Good for you miss!!! I love reading these stories of yours! xo

Heather said...

Oh wow! He sounds crazy! I'm impressed you made it through the whole meal!

I actually have a post scheduled about a time I was TRICKED into going on a date!

Keeping up with Kindra said...

omg that guy sounds like a pill! so glad you told him it wouldn't work...he sounds like a big turn off!!!!! love this blog its hilarious!

www.keepingupwithkindra.blogspot.com

Morgan said...

i have to agree, and say thank goodness you told him off. i'm sure the second date would have been equally, if not more uncomfortable than your first (and you were even with a friend!). :-)

Emily said...

That screams pedophile to me! Seriously. What self respecting grown man would ever ask those questions without having 'certain' thoughts.

Sorry if this is awkward, I work in a prison and have been around plenty of these types. It's gross.

Sam {fitnessfoodandfaith.blogspot.com} said...

eeek...what a story!!

Lindsey Leigh said...

goodness girlfriend. he sounds like one of the crazies. I tried online dating once and ran into a similar situation... except I never ended up meeting the guy. he was so annoying. texted me all the time... multiple times in a row... and if i responded with yeah he would be like "yeah..." I took the ... meaning "well what are YOU going to say". I tried to make conversation but they always ended with him saying one word like he did not know what to say. He never had anything to talk about interesting and never even asked me about myself or like my interest, etc. If I didn't respond to a text he would send me a message on the dating site. He grated on my last every loving nerve. He seemed nice enough but while he tried too hard, it was almost like he didn't try at all. he made zero attempts to get to know me. he would ask why we had not gone out and I would be like um well I don't just go out and hope to meet you somewhere, I make plans and then follow through with them. He would never make a solid plan. He would ask me what I was doing on friday night and then he would never say well we should go to dinner/movie/whatever you want to do on a first date. whew sorry for that long comment but i knew i could vent to you when I saw this. LOL my advice is ... don't give him a second chance.

Inna xoxo said...

I know ive said this before, but i LOVE this idea! Your brilliant! I LOVED this post! So interesting, and so hilarious! This was deff my favorite blog read all day, prob the past few days! haha!
That guy was a creeper. He seems like the stalker type, if he knew where you lived, hed prob be there!haha! Thank God your friend went! Seriously!
xoxo Inna :)
My Bloggie!

pay it forward said...

boy did i love that story! bahaha. nah i don't think i would've given him a second chance, because first impressions mean a lot. I mean, they're not everything, and things happen, but the fact about school and being a teacher? some of the things he said? SICK! anywhoo.. that gave me a good laugh. thanks for that but sorry you had to go through that. hah! don't we all.
♥ xoxo.

Megan said...

He definitely DOES NOT deserve a second chance! I hate when guys text/call all the time. Don't they understand that girls do not like that??? Why did he want to know about blood and pee?? Such a creeper.

Jessica said...

haha woww i reallllly wonder about some people!! I cannot even believe the things he said at lunch..whooo does that?!
glad you ended that before a second date. who knows what he would has said then!

Gris said...

Nope, no second chance.

Jenn W said...

NO !!! no second chance for that guy.

Ashley said...

i can already tell i'm going to intensly love this series! and no - no second chances!

Lyndsay said...

I love this series! I'm having a bunch of good laughs over it. :)

I'm not sure I would have stayed for dessert....haha.

*Kelly* said...

oohhh, Brandi is very sweet and how lucky to have a momma that makes homemade buscuits!!!

Didn't know Coach made doggie collars...so cool

Thanks for the crazy dating story. Us old, married ladies get a kick out of that stuff!!!!

AJ and Katy said...

Definitely no second chance for that guy, honestly, I would have been a little creeped out by his advances and constant texts. Everyone knows it isn't cute to text someone immediately after you leave them unless you're just thanking them for something, you just look like a stalker, I learned that the hard way with a guy I was really into once, hahaha ;)

Becareful with the online dating, although it sounds like you are done since your subscription is up, there are some real weirdos out there, seriously. One time my Mom met a guy on a dating website and they met for dinner and she just liked him as friends and stuff and when he finally found out that she just wasn't interested in him like that he started messaging her all these nasty things, told her she was just "average," and then started like calling and texting her phone and being harassing.

You definitely don't want to get yourself into a situation where things are sketchy or scary but I am sure you know that! :)

Nicoolmama said...

What a creepy guy!! No second chances...you could end up being seriously hurt!! I am so thankful for my sane little nerd right now. :)

Rissy said...

I swear after reading this I am considering taking a friend on all first dates with me! I am so paranoid, and that guy just doesn't sound normal... but not crazy enough to know beforehand!

CarissaExplainsItAll

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